Covergirl.

I hate writing cover letters. Hate hate hate hate. I've been looking through old cover letters that landed me interviews and jobs, and I sound like such a smarmy little twunt. But that smarmy little twunt got hired. Eventually.

I jumped through this hoop and that hoop and renegotiated this contract and developed this program and reduced this and improved that with a sunny smile and a spring in my step! Hire me! I am totally the most awesome thing ever!

I was just re-reading a job description for what might have been my dream job at one time, but now it makes my stomach turn. Presentations. Donor relations. Administration. Supervising. Maybe by the time their search committee gets around to reading my smarmy cover letter, I may actually be once again interested in contributing to society, and the nausea I feel now will be a distant, humorous memory.

Bleh.

I kept a log of all the jobs I applied for during the fall/winter/spring of 2003/2004. It is both awesome and appalling. Everything is meticulously recorded from September to mid-April: date, time of day, method of application, results, time of follow up calls. But in March, it started to fall apart and I started rambling:

4 March Thursday

Didn’t go to yoga class this morning: whoo hoo, big fucking surprise. Spent morning looking for a job and looking for funding for school.

Dropped off applications for 3 city jobs, 902776, 902780, 902779 -- in the job deposit box at City Hall. You can’t fight City Hall.

Filled in application at Corporate Coffee Chain #1 downtown. Chick wasn’t sure if they were hiring.

Inquired at Corporate Coffee Chain #2, library location. Girl said to come in before 2 pm and talk to manager. Of course I have forgotten the name of the manager.

8 March Monday

Didn’t go to gym. Instead: Watched some Ellen. Drank a brandy glass full of gin ‘n juice, had a few tokes.

Dropped off a resumé at Corporate Coffee Chain #2, library location.
Dropped resumé and cover letter at Corporate Coffee Chain #2, downtown mall location.
Dropped resumé and cover letter at Shoe Store with Shoes That I Covet.

Went to university to see about this medical study thing. Won’t be getting paid until sometime in May: $250. I should see if that much time with magnets will harm me somehow. On walk home, noticed that the sign was out of Shoe Store with Shoes That I Covet window. Strangely, there was no frantic message from them when I got home, imploring me to work for them immediately.

One message on machine from the porn store around the corner. Have an interview on Thursday at 3 pm. Time to celebrate: my first interview. And it’s at a porn store.

I’m so fucking happy.